Finally. I finished it... Just in time for the next issue, eh?
"The First Editions" - James Stoddard
As a certifiable bibliomaniac (or was that bibliomancer?), I appreciated this story. It put Stoddard back in a favorable light to me after that dreadful feel-good story about NASA and enlightenment (insert gag here). A book collector chances to encounter a sorcerer, and the collector becomes the collected. That is, he is transformed into a self-aware book whose contents contain his entire life story, even including events happening after his transformation. There, he falls in love with another book, and helps incite a book riot against the sorcerer. Meanwhile, they live in fear of the Grey Book (or was it Gray?), which mutters to itself, and sucks the words out of any book that comes in contact with it. Just don't put 'em together? Not so easy: these self-aware books (including Grey Book) can shuffle across the shelf. I suppose a fear of books could be considered irrational, unless one is illiterate (Is that offensive to illiterate people? Also, does it matter, since they won't be reading this?), but were I a self-aware book, after reading this piece, I would have a newfound fear for mysterious old tomes that mutter to themselves and creep along the shelf. On second thought, I don't think I'd have to be a book to appreciate that fear. 4/5.
"Five Thrillers" - Robert Reed
What happens when you take someone with, I assume, a dissocial personality disorder and put him in five different situations in which he must help some at the expense of others? Well, he finds the best solution for getting things done. Here, the best solution is whatever keeps him from getting the short end. In a universe overrun by militant furries-plus (called 'Rebirths', essentially people altering their genetic structure to be closer to animals, or what-have-you, very similar to a concept introducted in Transmetropolitain), a man is found at the center of a struggle between sapiens and Rebirths. He does what pleases his best interests, and along the way, causes the death and destruction of millions of Rebirths. He starts small (only one entity) in part one, and grows to be more ruthless in his destruction, until the very end. In an interview with Reed, he mentions that 24 in part inspired him to write this story. Though I've not seen 24, I'd imagine that this story would read a lot like synopses of five seasons of 24, only in space, and with turbo-furries. Nevertheless, and interesting read. 4/5.
"The Nocturnal Adventures of Dr. O and Mr. D" - Tim Sullivan
This story focuses on two men, Dr. O and Mr. D. They're hanging out together one evening and decide to go on a walk in the fog, following the impulse of the cat, Vishnu. All the while, their dialogue is tedious, laborious, like two scholars trying unsuccessfully to be funny in that elitist and condescending sort of way that scholars who fancy themselves comedians do. Eventually, it is revealed that they are all dead, or on an alternate plane of existence. Was it supposed to be kafkaesque? I'm not sure. If this story was supposed to get anywhere other than Speculative Fiction: Slice of (after)Life, I must have missed that stop along the way. 3/5, because it wasn't horrid, just blah.
"The 400-Million Year Itch" - Steven Utley
Part of Utley's Silurian Age series. I really couldn't get into it. I'm sure it was good and all, but unless the last story in the magazine is amazing, I'm burnt out by the time I've read it. 3/5
"Render Unto Caesar" - Kevin N. Haw
Funny because it's true. The IRS pursues NPCs in MMORPGs, seeking unpaid taxes (after all, they're virtual Americans). It was enjoyable, though it seemed too much like the Paul Di Fillipo pieces (Plumage from the Pegasus), so I wasn't able to enjoy it as much as I should have. According to the notes, Haw turned down a job for Blizzard. I can't begin to express my level of envy for him. 4/5.
"The Fountain of Neptune" - Kate Wilhelm
A woman with an inoperable brain tumor leaves everything, moves to Italy and chronicles her descent. She starts hallucinating, seeing strange things in pictures of the Fountain of Neptune, and having to come to terms with what was there, and what she saw, and whether those aspects were one in the same. This one didn't catch my interest. 3/5.
"The Apocalyptus Blooms" - Lucius Shepard
After reading any movie review by Shepard, I contemplate two notions: (a) Shepard is a real wit when it comes to movie reviews. Granted I've never read one by FSF's Movie Editor, Harlan Ellison, I consider Shepard to be the best film reviewer for this Magazine (and maybe the best reviewer of all the film review venues I peruse). (b) I doubt that this man has ever seen a film he actually enjoyed 100%, but that would lead to boring movie reviews, as people are usually more interesting when complaining. Proof by me. 5/5.
Best in Show:
I would have to say the most striking story from this month's issue is "Five Thrillers" by Robert Reed, with "First Editions" as a close second.
Crossposted in The Eventide Knave and The Gangster of L'Oeuf.
"The First Editions" - James Stoddard
As a certifiable bibliomaniac (or was that bibliomancer?), I appreciated this story. It put Stoddard back in a favorable light to me after that dreadful feel-good story about NASA and enlightenment (insert gag here). A book collector chances to encounter a sorcerer, and the collector becomes the collected. That is, he is transformed into a self-aware book whose contents contain his entire life story, even including events happening after his transformation. There, he falls in love with another book, and helps incite a book riot against the sorcerer. Meanwhile, they live in fear of the Grey Book (or was it Gray?), which mutters to itself, and sucks the words out of any book that comes in contact with it. Just don't put 'em together? Not so easy: these self-aware books (including Grey Book) can shuffle across the shelf. I suppose a fear of books could be considered irrational, unless one is illiterate (Is that offensive to illiterate people? Also, does it matter, since they won't be reading this?), but were I a self-aware book, after reading this piece, I would have a newfound fear for mysterious old tomes that mutter to themselves and creep along the shelf. On second thought, I don't think I'd have to be a book to appreciate that fear. 4/5.
"Five Thrillers" - Robert Reed
What happens when you take someone with, I assume, a dissocial personality disorder and put him in five different situations in which he must help some at the expense of others? Well, he finds the best solution for getting things done. Here, the best solution is whatever keeps him from getting the short end. In a universe overrun by militant furries-plus (called 'Rebirths', essentially people altering their genetic structure to be closer to animals, or what-have-you, very similar to a concept introducted in Transmetropolitain), a man is found at the center of a struggle between sapiens and Rebirths. He does what pleases his best interests, and along the way, causes the death and destruction of millions of Rebirths. He starts small (only one entity) in part one, and grows to be more ruthless in his destruction, until the very end. In an interview with Reed, he mentions that 24 in part inspired him to write this story. Though I've not seen 24, I'd imagine that this story would read a lot like synopses of five seasons of 24, only in space, and with turbo-furries. Nevertheless, and interesting read. 4/5.
"The Nocturnal Adventures of Dr. O and Mr. D" - Tim Sullivan
This story focuses on two men, Dr. O and Mr. D. They're hanging out together one evening and decide to go on a walk in the fog, following the impulse of the cat, Vishnu. All the while, their dialogue is tedious, laborious, like two scholars trying unsuccessfully to be funny in that elitist and condescending sort of way that scholars who fancy themselves comedians do. Eventually, it is revealed that they are all dead, or on an alternate plane of existence. Was it supposed to be kafkaesque? I'm not sure. If this story was supposed to get anywhere other than Speculative Fiction: Slice of (after)Life, I must have missed that stop along the way. 3/5, because it wasn't horrid, just blah.
"The 400-Million Year Itch" - Steven Utley
Part of Utley's Silurian Age series. I really couldn't get into it. I'm sure it was good and all, but unless the last story in the magazine is amazing, I'm burnt out by the time I've read it. 3/5
"Render Unto Caesar" - Kevin N. Haw
Funny because it's true. The IRS pursues NPCs in MMORPGs, seeking unpaid taxes (after all, they're virtual Americans). It was enjoyable, though it seemed too much like the Paul Di Fillipo pieces (Plumage from the Pegasus), so I wasn't able to enjoy it as much as I should have. According to the notes, Haw turned down a job for Blizzard. I can't begin to express my level of envy for him. 4/5.
"The Fountain of Neptune" - Kate Wilhelm
A woman with an inoperable brain tumor leaves everything, moves to Italy and chronicles her descent. She starts hallucinating, seeing strange things in pictures of the Fountain of Neptune, and having to come to terms with what was there, and what she saw, and whether those aspects were one in the same. This one didn't catch my interest. 3/5.
"The Apocalyptus Blooms" - Lucius Shepard
After reading any movie review by Shepard, I contemplate two notions: (a) Shepard is a real wit when it comes to movie reviews. Granted I've never read one by FSF's Movie Editor, Harlan Ellison, I consider Shepard to be the best film reviewer for this Magazine (and maybe the best reviewer of all the film review venues I peruse). (b) I doubt that this man has ever seen a film he actually enjoyed 100%, but that would lead to boring movie reviews, as people are usually more interesting when complaining. Proof by me. 5/5.
Best in Show:
I would have to say the most striking story from this month's issue is "Five Thrillers" by Robert Reed, with "First Editions" as a close second.
Crossposted in The Eventide Knave and The Gangster of L'Oeuf.
